Oh this is killing me. :( I know it's me who has to decide but I am so tensed for the last 3 weeks and I saw few people posting their problems here so I decided to post mine.

This is a little bit complicated. I was in a relationship with this guy which started five and half years back. We both loved each other and we both were committed even for marriage. We both were in Nepal at that time. Then he came to US and I was left alone. He used to write emails and sometimes even give me calls. For some reason, after few months, he completely cut off the contacts. I thought he dumped me. I went through a mental trauma for having to lose him. It still gives me creeps by remembering those days.

I came to US three years back (2.5 years after it happened). Just few months back, I was proposed by this guy who goes to the same school where I go. Although I did not love him initially, I could not help and accepted his proposal. We have been dating for 6 months and I have started to like him more than before. He is a very nice person, very caring and modest. I was thinking that I have found my Mr. right.

But just a month back, my ex contacted me surprisingly. He got my number from one of our common friends. We talked over the phone all night, and he explained me about the tension of work/study he was going through at that time, which kept him away from keeping in touch with me while I was in Nepal. He told me that he still loves me like anything and even will marry with me if need be.

I am not sure what to tell him. I had almost forgotten him, but he came back again all of a sudden. I don't want to leave my current bf as well, he has been extremely sincere with me so far. I am in trap. What should I do? :(

remember the hindi movie that had aishwarya rai, ajay devgan and salman khan?? forgot that name argggg....remember what aishwarya rai does in that movie?? She realizes in the end that the one who actually loved her is her current (her husband) and not her ex-joker lover. Be with a man, not a cry baby boy...it will give you a lasting happiness...

I think you are listening to ur heart. But remember, more people die of heart attack than Brain Tumour :)

that was "hum dil de chuke sanam" sajhauser.

Kamakshi:
Ur ex,where was he all these days/months?? now hes giving excuses that he was busy...wotever? Give me a break! but thats no excuse..
Tell him straightly that hes now too late for making such excuses
tell him that now u hve one.Stick to ur current bf,he deserves you n ur love !

Kamakshi,
Live in your present, not in your past. Even if your past comes to you with open arms, it might just be a ghost! How do you believe someone who was out of contact when you needed and now came forward seeing an 'opportunity'? If you opt to revert to your ex, it might be a grave mistake and might ruin all three lives. So, move on with your life, forget your ex however hard it is, and never look back.

I ALWAYS REMAIN ANSWERED, HOW DO PEOPLE HAVE TIME TO FALL IN FALL? MOVE ON THIS IS LIFE.... TAKE WHATEVER U GET IN UR WAY. EVERYTHING WILL BE OKAY....
STRESS ABT U... NOT FOR UR BF..

ma kamal thapa chor: I am not being selfish here. I thought my ex dumped me. And my current bf was the one who proposed to me. I did not even say yes to him. In fact, I have still not said it. I am just being flown with his emotions. I am not playing "who is better one" game here. I am pretty sure I still love my ex, more than my current bf. But I cannot leave him in disarray, coz he loves me so much, although I don't love him as much as he must be thinking. Amidst this context, I am finding it really hard to decide. God, I cannot even sleep properly these days. I don't know what to do : ( : (

you will be always safer and be in better deal:if you stick to person who loves you more than you love him/her.
fundamentals of being happy in love.
truth is you might still love you no.1 than no.2 but you know your no.1 is not trustworthy .Choice is yours !! life and relationship doesn't last only in love!!!

ImI: You may be right. But I am very skeptical about going with my current bf for a long run. He will expect me to love as much as he does which I won't be able to give him in return. He is a nice guy but I don't really feel a love vibe for him. That's the point. I don't know if in future it will emanate, but at the moment it looks pretty much null. It's not been long either, just 6 months. I don't know what is in store for both of us. Whereas with my ex, I have shared almost everything for more than a year and I am very much comfortable with him. I know almost everything about him, except for the sudden break up in communication which he had to do for a reason. Who would not go through bad/crunch time, especially in US? And he is back again, which means he still loves me. Why would he even need to contact me, if he did not love me?

you haven't been with your ex for a long time...surely things have happened in between. Lot of things can change his mind to come back to you as well..not that i am saying ..that is what happened..but there is a possibility. And also there is a possibility that he does love you and in between he was busy..so busy that he couldn't keep in touch..but i doubt that if u really cared for person one would just completely ditch the person (i never cud understand that)...anyway... and with the current one well...even you are not sure enuff to go ahead with marriage...and of course i think 6mths is too less of a time to know for sure. I don't think choosing either one is good. Take your time and think about it some more.....this is your life after all. You'll be taking a chance if you go back to ur ex without knowing everything...not that he prolly will share everything that happened in between. With the current one i guess in time u'll know what you want.

Hey Kamakshi, for you the answer should be straightforward. Go with the guy with the bigger package. Just to remind you of the thread you created:

- http://www.sajha.com/sajha/html/openThread.cfm?forum=2&ThreadID=36081

Since Nepali men have smaller packages (or so you claim), I am actually surprised that you are narrowing it down to two nepali guys with small pricks. Given you first hand expericnes with dicks of varying shapes, sizes and colors, I am just wondering why you are even considering a nepali guy. Good luck sampling.

Oh and good luck with your first boyfriend, who I know you are going to go runnign back to. My gut instinct is: he did not call you because he was having too much fun with the other girls here. Why should he even bother to send you an email knowing that you are stuck in nepal, while he is here having all the fun he can get. Too stressed out and over-worked to send a 5-min email? That's utter bs. And only a dumb biyatch like you will buy into that bs....

Yeah, go with the guy whose package is more than 6 inches (at least). And if both are more than 6 inches, then go for the one who is bigger. It's as simple as that.

It is really hard to tell who is "Mr Right" and who is not for a simple reason ...that is, it takes many years to prove who actually and sincerely loved us.....

I WISH we could find out (who actually and sincerely loved us) in a matter of 6 months or a year so that we could leave the 'Mr Wrong/Miss Wrong' and find someone else who could be 'Mr Right/Miss Right.'

It is usually only after years we know that we had been with Mr Right/Miss Right or Mr Wrong/Miss Wrong......the tragedy is that by then we cannot go back in time reverse the whole situation even if we know that we had been with Mr Wrong/Miss Wrong after many years together.

Choosing a mate is a big gamble...we dont always win however that does mean we always lose either.

My only advice: Choose your mate based on your longterm goals and priorities....and you are most likely will not be on the losing side. Finding someone who actually loved you is like winning a big jackpot. Even winners dont always hit a big jackpot. The winners who hit a big jackpot are the very lucky ones.

Someone said that in Las Vegas you can gamble at two places, at Casinos IF NOT at a church chapels (wedding).

You know what you should do? You should let both know about it and discuss and get to the conclusion. If you don't let them know now then you would never know who is the Mr. Right. Trust me once you let them know you will know who is who. The right Mr. will give you a good advise and will be with no matter what the decision will be. True lover will always be with you this way or that way. You know what I'm saying! You better work with your brain not with your heart.

Kamakshi Posted on 09-16-06 8:38 PM Reply | Notify Admin
don't want to sound harsh, but it's quite a tacit fact that nepali men have small package. Not that it hurts a lot to women, but just as most men look for huge assets on women, nepali men fail to comprehend that a woman would almost always look for big (not huge) package.

I know there are quite a few techniques available in the market for enlargement. So, I hereby, suggest all nepalese men to go for at least one of them so that they don't have to end up blushing while making out. It's a shame! It's better late than never.

Good Luck! '


Kamakshi Posted again on 09-20-06 12:30 PM Reply | Notify Admin
I knew that this topic is going to be offending to many. At least from some of the responses, I can say that.

Nepali guys generally tend to get attracted to women with big assets, as per my reading. Nepali women just like women from other countries do prefer if their men have big package as well. It's just a matter of expressing oneself. It's not that I have my identity concealed, so that helps me to boldly express my opinions here. But, it's one of those things, that I have genuinely felt and I won't refrain from discussing about it in public, if need be. I have seen and met women who have dumped their bfs because of the very reason.

Yes, women do want big package! Be it nepali, american, mexican, indian or so on. And yes, size does matter! Those who don't agree with this are either a psycho or don't have big package himself, or want to give some solace to himself by expressing other stuffs like you need to know how to use it, it's about motion of the ocean not the ocean...yada yada which in my view is a BS.

So, the solution is so clear, take a ruler, measure each of the guy's thing, the one with the bigger package gets to be the man of your dream!Isn't that what matters you the most! Good luck

I knew men (hypocrites) ask questions to women boldness everytime. I don't understand why this has to be EXACTLY this way. In the other thread "Nepali Men Have Small...", I expressed what I GENUINELY felt. And over here, it's my very presonal problem which I can and hopefully will solve but just wanted to see how other people view it and suggest me to do.

Lot of people have commented on this already so I might be only repeating what has already been said. I say leave your current boyfriend, and dont even think about talking to your ex who couldnt call/email you when you still loved him. Thats a bad way to dump someone and everyone in US is busy..but they have their priorities. Its to to accept it, but you were not his priority at that time and you are not one right now. Next time you talk to him, tell him you have found a nice guy and you have moved on with your life.
And reading what you have said about your bf, looks like you are still looking..not ready to settle. I think going back to your ex will be a really bad move so you should take a clean break from relationships for sometime. Think about what your future partner should be like..what you can compromise on, what you absolutely need and go for it.
I think you are ruining your current bf's life by staying with him when you are not totally comitted to him.
The rule I follow in this kinda situation: when you have a doubt, dump it.

But you know now what you should be doing?

As I said.......!

You should let both know about it and discuss and get to the conclusion. If you don't let them know now then you would never know who is the Mr. Right. Trust me once you let them know you will know who is who. The right Mr. will give you a good advise and will be with no matter what the decision will be. True lover will always be with you this way or that way. You know what I'm saying! You better work with your brain not with your heart.

Not too sure if it is a real situation or not, coz we see too many fake stories here in Sajha. Apologies for doubting, if indeed it is a true story.

If it is, then here's my two cents.
Marry the person that loves you, not just the one you love. In your case, it seems from outside that both love you. But your ex was okay with giving you up under pressure of work/study abroad. There is a good likelihood he could do the same again...right?
Now the other person, do you love him? I am not asking if you like him or not. He hasn't been tested like your ex, so you cannot say he stands out from the herd, but he gets the benefit of doubt.
I'd agree with most of the Sajhaites, choose the new flame. Your ex is back because he didn't find anyone better..he will probably leave you if he does. The other one gets the benefit of doubt.

Bostongirl

How can you say that she was not his priority then and she is not going to be his priorities now.

Yeah.. it is fair to speculate but is is not fair to be absolutely certain.

If you can say this about her EX then you have just opened the door for speculation about her current boyfriend as well and all her future boyfriends. What if her current boyfriend takes her out of his list of priorities lets say two years from now and calls/emails to her with an intention to get back together 4 years later just as her EX is doing right now.

Hehehe, are u insane.. go one with the bigger package.